Carguy
08-13-2003, 03:49 PM
Hey all,
Humour from the Musclecarclub.com site. I removed some and edited a few to "Canadianize" the content. There are more at Link (http://www.musclecarclub.com/humor/humor-racing.shtml)
YOU MIGHT BE A RACER IF ...
You are happiest when your street car's tires are worn to racing depth and the wear bars are showing.
When something falls off of your car, you wonder how much weight you just saved.
You bought a race car before buying a house.
You bought a race car before buying furniture for the new house.
You're looking for a tow vehicle and still haven't bought furniture!
The requirements you give your real estate agent are (in order of importance):
1) 8 car climate controlled garage with an attached shop.
2) Outside parking for 6 cars, a motor home, a crew cab dually, a 28' enclosed trailer and a 34' 5th wheel.
3) 3 phase 220V outlets in the garage for your welder.
4) A grease pit.
5) Deaf neighbors.
6) Some sort of house with a working toilet & shower on the property - or - hookups for the motor home.
You sit in your race car in a dark garage and make car noises and shift and practice your heel and toe, while waiting for your motor to get back from the machine shop.
More than one racer supply store recognizes your voice and greets you by name when you call.
You astound the clerk at Canadian Tire by bringing in a snapped breaker bar every other week or so.
A neighbor asks if you have any oil, to which you query, "Synthetic or organic?" and they reply, "Vegetable or corn."
You always want to change something on your street car to make it handle better.
You've tried to convince your wife you needed that flow bench to fix the air filter on her station wagon. LMAO!!!
You save broken car parts as "momentous" or post "this is how I broke my car" messages on all the boards you subcsribe.
You quote your street tire wear life in weeks or number of events in a season rather than kilometres.
After you tell your wife where you'd like to go on vacation she answers: "Why...is there a race there?"
You want to take apart and rebuild things, even though they are not broken.
You look for hot cars in the movies and try to guess what engine size, tire size, and whether or not it has forced induction.
You wash your car like it was your firstborn child, you tend to its needs like it was your own body, you protect it like it's your family, then you drive it like you stole it.
You understand racing is a way of life, not just a means of transportation.
Enjoy! :)
CarGuy
Humour from the Musclecarclub.com site. I removed some and edited a few to "Canadianize" the content. There are more at Link (http://www.musclecarclub.com/humor/humor-racing.shtml)
YOU MIGHT BE A RACER IF ...
You are happiest when your street car's tires are worn to racing depth and the wear bars are showing.
When something falls off of your car, you wonder how much weight you just saved.
You bought a race car before buying a house.
You bought a race car before buying furniture for the new house.
You're looking for a tow vehicle and still haven't bought furniture!
The requirements you give your real estate agent are (in order of importance):
1) 8 car climate controlled garage with an attached shop.
2) Outside parking for 6 cars, a motor home, a crew cab dually, a 28' enclosed trailer and a 34' 5th wheel.
3) 3 phase 220V outlets in the garage for your welder.
4) A grease pit.
5) Deaf neighbors.
6) Some sort of house with a working toilet & shower on the property - or - hookups for the motor home.
You sit in your race car in a dark garage and make car noises and shift and practice your heel and toe, while waiting for your motor to get back from the machine shop.
More than one racer supply store recognizes your voice and greets you by name when you call.
You astound the clerk at Canadian Tire by bringing in a snapped breaker bar every other week or so.
A neighbor asks if you have any oil, to which you query, "Synthetic or organic?" and they reply, "Vegetable or corn."
You always want to change something on your street car to make it handle better.
You've tried to convince your wife you needed that flow bench to fix the air filter on her station wagon. LMAO!!!
You save broken car parts as "momentous" or post "this is how I broke my car" messages on all the boards you subcsribe.
You quote your street tire wear life in weeks or number of events in a season rather than kilometres.
After you tell your wife where you'd like to go on vacation she answers: "Why...is there a race there?"
You want to take apart and rebuild things, even though they are not broken.
You look for hot cars in the movies and try to guess what engine size, tire size, and whether or not it has forced induction.
You wash your car like it was your firstborn child, you tend to its needs like it was your own body, you protect it like it's your family, then you drive it like you stole it.
You understand racing is a way of life, not just a means of transportation.
Enjoy! :)
CarGuy